Get him out now!

Gail Collins has an idea:

Thanksgiving is next week, and President Bush could make it a really special holiday by resigning.

Seriously. We have an economy that's crashing and a vacuum at the top. Bush -- who is currently on a trip to Peru to meet with Asian leaders who no longer care what he thinks -- hasn't got the clout, or possibly even the energy, to do anything useful. His most recent contribution to resolving the fiscal crisis was lecturing representatives of the world's most important economies on the glories of free-market capitalism.

Putting Barack Obama in charge immediately isn't impossible. Dick Cheney, obviously, would have to quit as well as Bush. In fact, just to be on the safe side, the vice president ought to turn in his resignation first. (We're desperate, but not crazy.) Then House Speaker Nancy Pelosi would become president until Jan. 20. Obviously, she'd defer to her party's incoming chief executive, and Barack Obama could begin governing.

As a bonus, the Pelosi presidency would put a woman in the White House this year after all. On the downside, a few right-wing talk-show hosts might succumb to apoplexy. That would, of course, be terrible, but I'm afraid we might have to take the risk in the name of a greater good.

Steve Benen's on board. Since we're waxing fanciful, let me say I oppose this precise configuration of things. Before Pelosi could become president, she'd have to relinquish her seat in the House of Representatives (Speaker or not, she's still an elected official) and hand the Big Gavel (probably) over to the less-than-progressive Steny Hoyer. All for a one month presidency. Then once Obama takes over, and with all the cabinet positions fixed, she'd basically be out in the wilderness for two years or more.

How about this sequence of events instead: 1). Condoleezza Rice resigns as Secretary of State. 2). George Bush appoints Barack Obama in her place. 3). George Bush and Dick Cheney resign their positions (or get kicked out by the Congress). 4). Both Nancy Pelosi and Robert Byrd refuse to adhere to the chain of succession. 5). Obama becomes president.

It would all take a couple days, and could go down smoothly so long as Obama and his cabinet picks were ready to hit the ground running. Of course, there'd remain the problem that the Senate will be split 51-49 until January, so unless the relevant governors/state legislatures were willing to play along and install the new senators-elect a few weeks early, it would still be pretty hard for the new crew to push any serious legislation through the Congress.

Comments

A few of us in Chicago recently recorded our musical farewell to W, and we're definitely ready to say goodbye. The song is called "Crawl Back To Crawford."

CRAWL BACK TO CRAWFORD
(Matt Farmer)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3I9-BJtvQzE

VERSE
Well, for eight long years we've been payin' your rent
But now your lease done run
And all our money's been spent
So pack up your bags
And take a last look around
At how you drove a great nation straight into the ground

CHORUS
And don't let the door
Hit you in the ass on the way out
Don't bother with the goodbyes
Just make sure that you stay out
There ain't no need to call
No need to write
We don't even need you to turn out the light
Just crawl back to Crawford, brother
Promise that you'll leave us alone

VERSE
Every step of the way, your story's been the same
Just cruisin' through the world
On your daddy's name
You had the oilmen friends
You had the Skull and Bones
But it never would have happened if your name was Jones

REPEAT CHORUS

BRIDGE
Slam dunk, privatize, deregulate
Tax cuts, trickle down
The politics of hate
Flag pin, waterboard
Intelligent design
You were handed your throne by just five of the nine

REPEAT CHORUS X2

Posted by: Matt Farmer on November 22, 2008 04:31 PM

Oh come on. As long as you're doing science fiction: Cheney resigns. Obama appointed Veep, confirmed by Senate. Bush resigns. Simple. But, you know, science fiction.

Posted by: dave.s. on November 23, 2008 02:18 PM

Byrd would never go for it. Remember, as a young man he slaughtered the sheep whose skin was turned into the vellum the Constitution was written on. He frowns on constitutional shenanigans (and everything else).

The only way he wouldn't hold onto the presidency for dear life is if he immediately instructed his cabinet to invoke the Twentieth Amendment, on the grounds that he's older than dirt and twice as slow. Which he probably would, just so he could transmit the requisite letters to Congress asserting his fitness to serve, thereby plunging the nation into the sort of constitutional crisis only Robert Byrd could understand in the first place. Then he'd chuckle and pour hisself a mint julep.

Posted by: Matt on November 23, 2008 05:27 PM

...although Byrd would probably point out that I'd confused the Twentieth Amendment with the Twenty-Fifth above, and then cane me with a hickory switch, and then pat me on the head and tell me I was a good boy and give me a nickel for a Coke.

Posted by: Matt on November 23, 2008 05:31 PM

i like the dave s. plan. but i think , in addition, it should include the requirement that karolina kurkova perform oral sex on me, supersam. i realize that there is no precedent for this and it is not mentioned in the constitution, but it would be a nice touch, wouldn't it? and as long as we're dreaming...

Posted by: supersam on November 24, 2008 11:55 PM

No such luck, SuperS. But if you're a CEO - or even if you happen to have $20 - maybe Megan M. will do it. Also maybe if you're a lesbian.

Posted by: Rick on November 25, 2008 12:36 PM

It'll cost you $100. Unless your a Republican. And you have to tell me that you think I'm cute, girl.

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Get him out now!

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